If you happen to be dieting and your silk lined slacks are suddenly too big, don’t wear them over satin underwear. Just a suggestion ….
Today the Librarian provided pizza for my class — their reward for reading 325 books during Nevada Reading Week. Five pizzas were delivered. Each pizza was cut in 8 pieces. That is 40 pieces of pizza for 24 children. Do you detect a problem?
Despite the foul up, every child received two pieces of pizza. Pretty neat math, huh? I just took the biggest pieces and cut them in half. I even managed a piece of pizza for myself, and two slices left over. Kind of like the loaves and the fishes — miracles are happening every day. And yes, I know this is a school, but I still prayed over the pizza — I just didn’t do so aloud.
Last night when I went to bed my kitchen was clean. My floor was swept. Both the throw rugs were freshly laundered and free of feline fur. One was in front of the sink. The other was in front of the stove.
This morning when I wandered into my kitchen I found this:
The lump in the rug to your right is Christmas, and had I waited another second to snap the pic, I would have captured her paw reaching out to twap Fluffy. A great battle ensued — all in fun, of course. It took them awhile to notice me but as soon as they did, they hot-tailed it out of the kitchen (see Fluffy’s hind legs in retreat?) and left me this:
Please note the cat fur all over the carpets! And the shoes were originally by the front door! That appliance you are looking at is the washing machine, and I am thinking I should put the cats in it, not the rugs. Why do I even bother to clean?
Two cats, free to good home. Make an offer.
I cleaned my carpet and rearranged my furniture. Work. Work. Work. Scrub. Scrub. Scrub. It looks worse then it did before. Now that I’ve removed all the dirt from the carpet, the stains show up really well.
I live in a dump.
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I just used the exact same hair dye I have always used. Same brand. Same box. Same number. My hair looks decidedly red. It had better not do so when it dries.
Update: Hair is dry. It is Revlon Light Blond #81, just like it’s supposed to be. Phew!
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The cats are afraid of the livingroom. They are tippy-toeing across the carpet smelling every inch. The love seat is terrorizing Christmas. It isn’t where it’s supposed to be. She’s afraid it’s going to pounce on her.
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Curves Report: Well, I am not too happy with me. I lost 6 pounds this month, but regained two. It was probably the ice cream cone and the choclate Coke. In future I can have one or the other, but not both. The good news is, I lost an inch and a half around my waist, and that’s one place I hadn’t been slimming. I am losing, but it’s slow going.
As I mentioned last Tuesday, I am taking the Curves Weight Loss Challenge class. Following their diet I went from losing 3-5 pounds a week, to losing just one. With that thought in mind I dropped the diet — though I stayed in the class — and went back to eating my way. This week I lost another three pounds. My way works for me.
I eat whatever I please. I just eat it in moderation. For instance, I took three days to eat a bag of M&M’s, instead of eating three bags of M&M’s in one day. The other day my friend and I went to Arby’s for lunch. I ordered the turkey club, but tossed most of the bread as I ate. I also ordered curly fries. There is no way I am going to Arby’s without having curly fries dipped in Horsey Sauce — so, when they handed me my tray, I grabbed a huge handful of those fries and dumped them in the garbage on the way past. No way I can eat what isn’t on my plate.
Ignore all that guilt your mom piled on you about having to clean your plate. All that food you’re wasting could feed a third world nation! First off, no, it couldn’t, because the abundance is in my country, and there is no way for them to access it. Secondly, how is my being fat going to prevent someone else from starving? Think about it.
Next week we weight and measure. Stay tuned.