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Things I Learned While I Was Sick

It is possible to sleep while sitting up on the toilet.  Just don’t roll over.

My train of thought has no track, and the engine is in need of detailing.

Dishes multiply in the kitchen sink when no one is watching them.

The new roll of toilet paper is always one inch further away than my arm is long.

Toothpaste and cortisone cream are not interchangeable.

The remote control to the ceiling fan will not operate the television.


  1. Well, I just hope this means you’re better now, after learning these lessons. If I had to choose, I’d say mixing up the toothpaste and cortisone is the worse.

  2. We have a load of remotes in a box next to the sofa. It is always interesting to see which one we have and will it work what we would like it to. We do not have a remote for the fan in the family room, but do have one upstairs. It is sort of a luxury.

  3. Amber — if we didn’t have remote controls to our ceiling fans, they would be nothing more than ceiling decorations. These remotes are necessary if we want the little fan blades to go round in circles. However, they are of little use when trying to change the volume on the TV.

  4. Oh, you poor thing. That cortisone cream/toothpaste mix up sounds bad. It reminds me of a story my parents tell about when my dad put Ben Gay on my diaper rash instead of Desitin. I’m told that I screamed bloody murder, and my poor dad felt horrible. My mom still hasn’t forgiven him for that.

    I hope you are fully recovered very soon. Long toilet sitting can be exhausting.

  5. Wellllllllllll… I’ve definitely learned that first one for myself! And the 2nd one is just a way of life for some of us…. dishes ARE like bunnies… and they really don’t even care if you watch! I bet your gums didn’t itch for awhile!

    1. Actually, Melli, I dabbed the toothpaste on my mosquito bite. It still itched, but when I scratched it smelled minty fresh!

  6. Sorry you have been sick. I didn’t know fans had remote controls. How very cool. Wish I had a remote for mine. I find dishes multiply in my sink even when I’m not sick, but then you are probably much more tidy and efficient than I am. I believe you about cortisone and toothpaste, though I have never put it to the test. The other three I find again to be a general rule even when I’m not sick. Hope you are feeling better.

  7. That’s something I never tried, sleeping on the toilet, all the other things could happen to me too even without being sick, lol !

  8. Well my Dad always used to tell me “Experience is the Best Teacher”

    What did we learn Miss Quilly?

    Glad you are feeling better.

  9. I’ve replicated your cortisone cream/toothpaste experiment. It’s hard to say “I’m an idiot” five times fast with disgusting grease in your mouth, isn’t it?

    1. Doug — uhm, I put the toothpaste on my bug bites, not my toothbrush — and I’m perfectly happy to have done it my way, thanks.

  10. My remote control does both the ceiling fan and the tv. And a lot of other cool stuff too.

    Mmmm. Scratch and sniff bug bites. What a cool idea!!

    Lisa’s last blog post..Hearts and Lace

        1. Dishwasher? At my house they are called “hands” and I’m just as content NOT to have them operated by remote control, thank you.

  11. Glad you’re feeling better! And I’m glad the toothpaste mix up was the way you did it and not the other way around.

    I have dozed off on the toilet before — and jerked awake as I almost fell off.

    Barbara H.’s last blog post..Flag Day

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