Tales on Tuesday ~ All in the Family

Nessa of, The Chrysalis Stage, hosts a weekly writing theme called Tales on Tuesday.

The idea is to tell a short, short (500 words or less) story based on the week’s theme. To provide us inspiration, each theme will be the title of a TV show. This week’s theme is from “All in the Family,” an Emmy winning American sit-com which aired on ABC from January 12, 1971 to April 8, 1979. If you wish to join Tales on Tuesday, please visit Nessa for the list of upcoming themes, and remember, your story does not have to relate to the series.

The Last Date

Jerry reluctantly agreed to go to Fredia’s house for dinner.  He wasn’t really a ‘meet the parents’ kind of guy but for some reason Frieda had him doing a lot of things he wasn’t used to.  He couldn’t remember the last time he dated any one woman as long as he’d dated Fredia.  Usually after three or four dates he got what he wanted and moved on to the next conquest.

Jerry pulled into the parking lot of the Fremont Apartments and flipped his cell phone open.  He punched in Freida’s number and heard her sweet voice come on the line.  “Hey,” he said.  “I’m really looking forward to tonight.  I’m just going to catch a shower. I’ll be over in an hour or so.  I can’t wait to see you.”

After hanging up he got out of the car and took the stairs to apartment number three.  He rang the bell.  Joy answered almost immediately.  “You’re late!” she said.

“Yes, I know.  I have to cancel our date tonight.  The boss wants overtime. This is my dinner break. I had to see you.”  He backed Joy up against the wall and kissed her soundly, sliding his hands under her blouse.

Jerry left the apartment  an hour later, refreshed and showered. The lovely diversions provided by Joy are what kept Jerry so patient with Fredia, but Joy’s attractions were starting to pale and she was whining more and more about how little she saw of Jerry and how they never seemed to do anything any more but have sex.  Women were all the same.

Jerry parked in front of Fredia’s house and sat in the car.  He considered driving away.  She might never give in short of marriage and that was one price he wouldn’t pay for sex.  Still, she was lovely and virgins were worth the extra effort.  Joy had been — and that girl before her, what was her name?  Cara? Carla? Chloe?  Well, C something, anyway.

Jerry got out of the car and approached the house with a brand new determination.  Fredia wasn’t going to be the one who got away.

A gorgeous older woman opened the door.  Fredia’s mother?  Jerry eyed her.  She wasn’t virgin territory, but some older women really knew how to sizzle.  She might be worth a romp in the closest.  He flashed his sexiest smile as he stepped into the foyer.  The mama preened.

“Mom is that Jerry?”  He heard Fredia’s voice float down the stair case.  “I’ll be there in just a minute.”

“I’m Mona,” Fredia’s mom said.  “Why don’t you come into the living room and make yourself comfortable?”  She hooked her arm through Jerry’s and led him through the archway to the right.  Jerry was mentally testing his best lines, trying to decide which one to use on Mona, and was totally unprepared to find a man standing in the middle of the living room.

“Jerry,” the man said.  “I’ve heard so much about you, I feel we’ve already met.”  He grabbed Jerry’s hand and gripped it way too tight.  Something in the man’s eyes set off a warning bell in Jerry’s head.  He knew that this dinner was his last date with Freida.  This wasn’t a poppa to trifle with.  Unfortunately, that probably meant mama was off the menu, too.  Jerry put on what he hoped looked like a sincere smile.

Fredia stepped into the room and stopped just inside the door.  “The table is ready,” she said.  “Why don’t we all step into the dining room?”

Jerry was surprised she hadn’t greeted him and that there wasn’t to be any small talk first, but with mama holding his arm on one side and papa following at his back, he stepped into the dinning room.  The table wasn’t set, but it was already occupied.  Mama waved her left hand at the two girls seated on the far side.  “I believe you’ve met my other two daughters, Joy and Clarissa?”

“Ah–”  Jerry stared in shock.  Fredia walked over and stood behind her sisters.

Mama tightened her grip on Jerry’s arm and papa’s hand came down heavy on his shoulder.  “Where’s that carving knife?” he asked his daughters.

29 thoughts on “Tales on Tuesday ~ All in the Family

  1. OMG…that’s what he gets for double dipping. I sure like to find out what the carving knife carved up on that dinner. Well done. And boy did he keep it all in the family I tell ya. Meathead LOL 🙂

  2. Oh my goodness, what a GREAT ending to a great story! I didn’t see that coming at all!
    Epic! Very tangled and justified end for Jer…
    Have a great week!

  3. He’s not two-timing @Akelamalu, he’s three-timing! The poor daughters…I wonder when they figured it all out? Jerry was definitely not the sharpest knife in the drawer (but hopefully papa’s kinfe was) ;0

  4. Shop Williams-Sonoma’s selection of professional-grade carving knives, carving sets and slicing knives ?

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