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Not So Rosy

On Valentine’s Day, I sent my love red roses. I sent them, but they have yet to arrive. I paid for them, but he’s seen not a petal. Today, for the third time I dialed the FTD 1-800 number to complain. Today for the third time I talked to a very pleasant clerk. This one gave me her name and her personal assurance that the flowers would be delivered tomorrow.

She also read me the history of my order: The flowers were ordered for the 14th. Forty-five minutes later delivery was changed to the 13th. Due to weather conditions, delivery could not be made. Delivery was rescheduled for the 16th. The local florist cancelled the delivery due to lack of stock. (Right here O’Ceallaigh will insert an, “I told you so.”) The florist did not bother to contact FTD. No new delivery time was scheduled. I phoned in and requested delivery for the 20th.

At this point the friendly clerk reading me the order history said, “Uh-oh.” I queried, “What does uh-oh mean?” She explained that the clerk who took my call for delivery on the 20th typed in all the particulars for said delivery — including a $25.00 free upgrade by way of apology — then, instead of clicking send, she apparently cancelled the order. “Uncancel it,” I said.

Tabitha, the clerk I spoke to today, said she would personally call the local florist, relay the delivery instructions, and make certain they had the stock on hand. She also took my phone number and promised me a phone call if any glitches arose.

She didn’t call. I am assuming that Valentine’s Day is tomorrow, finally.


In other news: I’ve started the Six Week Diet Challenge at Curves (which is an 8 week course) and my official weight loss to date is 19.5 pounds, and I dropped another 1.3% in body fat.


Also, anybody who actually thought O’Ceallaigh quit blogging, I’d like to apologize for leading you astray. He is the unreliable one, not me. Forgive him for it and pop by his blog. His current story made me laugh out loud, gasp for breath, and wipe tears from my eyes so I could keep reading.

Quilly is the pseudonym of Charlene L. Amsden, who lives on The Big Island in Hawaii. When she is not hanging out with Amoeba, she is likely teaching or sewing. Or she could be cooking, taking photographs, or even writing. But if she's not doing any of that, she's probably on Facebook or tinkering with her blog.


  1. This is what we get for thinking that Valentine’s Day needs to be in flippin’ February. Except in California. And Australia. Which is probably where those roses are coming from – not even the Californians can grow a decent rose before April.

    Next time, send you. You could walk here and arrive faster than those roses. nyuk nyuk. Marlene.


  2. OC — you know, it probably wouldn’t have cost that much more to send myself. Next Valentine’s Day, if I decide you need flowers, I will hand deliver them. Hopefully that won’t involve a cross country walk.


  3. For those in love Valentine’s Day is everyday… It really doesn’t matter when the flowers arrive. But if they don’t get there soon I’d demand a refund if I were you!

  4. There are always roadblocks in the path of true love. It’s nice to know you are willing to make the effort to keep your passion alive ; D

    Great news on your weightloss. Congratulations.

  5. I once had a florist friend. She said that guys would come in on Valentine’s Day and beg to PAY them to sweep the floor. Just so they could get a handful of rotting rose petals. Anything so they wouldn’t have to show up without flowers on Valentine’s Day. The problem was, there weren’t even petals by that time. ‘Course, I told my husband about that, waited for him to shake his head, and then said, “Oh well. Diamonds last longer anyway.” ROFL!

    I apologize. My last job must have been at Curves, doing the math for their Diet Challenge calendar. Congrats on the loss. Go over to my blog and I’ll leave a link to a place that really helped me, and doesn’t conflict with Curves diet at all.

  6. Gawpo — Love blooms even without flowers, but I do not love FTD.

    Rob — true.

    DaBich — thanks.

    Nessa — the roses are definately keeping the passion alive — but in this case it’s my passion to kill someone from FTD.

    Brig — now folks can run to the grocery store and grab a last minute bouquet. The flowers aren’t as fresh — but at least you know when they’re going to arrive. I’ll be by your place in a bit. Thanks.

  7. Awesome, super weight loss update! I’ve always wondered if the Curves craze was working for anybody. It just doesn’t look like enough work to me. (she says while drinking pepsi and eating a peanut butter cup). February is a stupid month for Valentines Day.

  8. You have been nominated for the Battle of the Blogs. Sorry this sounds “canned” because, well, this is canned. I have received lots of entries. I will be working on the ballots that will probably come out next Tuesday (2/27), but this is what I would like from you:

    1. First: do you want your blog to be entered?
    2. If you could, could you send me a brief (one paragraph) description of your site for me to include with a link to your URL (blog name). I am taking the names from the top of the blogs. Oh, and use the bloggerbattle(at)

    You can use the link above to visit the Battle of the Blogs if you have no idea what this is. And, relax, it just means you are loved.

  9. Congrats on the weightloss, Quilly! Whoot.

    I finally got my pudge going back to Curves. Hopefully this means I’ll stop wheezing when I try to pry the seal off the Pringles cannister.

  10. Hope the roses arrived or you got your refund and they delivered the roses for the inconvenience. Did it warm up in Vegas yet. You may want to head north to warm up. Offer still open to send you a scraper for the frost on the windshield.

  11. Kat — thank you — and as with any diet aid — it works as much as the dieter allows it to.

    Leesa — Wow! I am honored. Email sent.

    Jenna — you are too funny! There isn’t a potato chip can opening machine to work out on. Put your inventor’s cap on.

    Melli — if he doesn’t get the roses you won’t have to check here. You’ll read about it on the national news.

    And thanks for cheerleading. You’re my hero.

    Dr. John — they all had better be happy!

    Silver — I like tradition — but I also like breaking it. I prefer it not break me.

    Bill — I am hoping the roses arrived, too. And thanks for the offer of a scaper, but I find that the plastic pancake turner works fine.

  12. Polona — nice AND efficent! Yay!

    Jenna — oooookay — but it might frighten your potential suitors.

    Penguin — OC lives in the land of snow and ice, not me!

  13. Do yourself a big favor the next time you want to order flowers and call your own LOCAL REAL FLORIST rather than any of the 800 FLORAL or DOT.CON MIDDLEMEN.

    Not only will you be able to get your flowers delivered, if in fact they are deliverable despite an ICE STORM, you will also get your full 100% VALUE in the gift which you are sending.

    MIDDLEMEN skim off their 30% commissions as well as the $ervice charge they collect from you after which, they then try to subcontract your order back out to a FLORIST at a net amount of 70% plus nothing to cover that florist’s cost of delivery.

    You tried to use a company which was once, florist owned and operated up and until they sold it to a FORE PROFIT private company in 1993.

    The new FORE PROFIT COMPANY could care less about the old standards of quality and service and even less about the florists they try to USE at chump change from your dollar.

    Same could be said for those FARM DIRECT do-it-all-yourself FLOWER kits in a box with that free vase offer because WHAT YOU SEE ISN’T THEY’LL GET!

    Valentine’s Day is the worst ONE DAY in the floral industry even for REAL FLORISTS due to the extreme high volume of floral orders all calling for HIGHLY PERISHABLE items which require a great deal of care, especially in FREEZING TEMPERATURES.

    Suffice it to say that, if you wanted a PINT of BLACK and TAN, you wouldn’t be walking into a dairy to get one.

  14. Thanks for leaving my GOOD ADVICE comments on your blog.

    This does come from my 39 years of experience as a professional REAL FLORIST and my lovely wife and I take exception to the fact that, these 800 FLORAL and DOT.CON middlemen try to use the FILLING FLORIST as a scapegoat for their own massive main frame software computer problems.

    They would love DA PUBLIC to believe that it was DA FLORISTS who (F)ailed (T)o (D)eliver when in fact, it was their own failures to have enough of a back up system for their high speed internet connections in addition to the ICE STORM which plaqued many florists in our Northern Climates.

    To add insult to injury (to you as a consumer), they then try to offer you an alternative delivery date through any florist they could get your order printed out to and without contacting that florist FIRST to ascertain whether or not, they could in fact, meet or exceed your expectations.

    If you consider my critical consumer information (FACTS) to be SPAM than I do not understand its meaning.

    There is a growing number of REAL FLORISTS (thousands) across this country which have become sick and tired of our floral customers being DUPED by these floral order gatherer marketing companies who wouldn’t know a RED FREEDOM ROSE from a CHARLOTTE unless they had the image.

    None of them have the ability to professionally arrange flowers let alone make the determination if they are even top quality.

    Fact is that, in their buildings and cubicles, they DO NOT HAVE ANY FLOWERS to fill your order and since they are NOT REAL FLORISTS, they do not have the ability or expertise to guide you into making the proper selections at any given time of the year due to seasonal variables and market conditions.

    In the end, they only want to CAPTURE YOUR 100% SALE and will tell you anything they think you need to hear or let you click on any image and order date you choose in order for them to meet their objective of a next quarter’s profits.

    Then, and when your wishes don’t come true, they turn around and suggest to YOU that, DA FLORIST is to blame.

    Your BOTTOM LINE is, IF YOU WANT REAL FLOWERS find a local REAL FLORIST who has the REAL FLOWERS and $ERVICE you are seeking and can professionally guide you through the entire process. Then, and only if they make a mistake, at least you can hold them personally responsible for making amends rather than going through that THIRD PARTY MIDDLEMAN who doesn’t have a clue since, THEY DO NONE OF THE DO!

    And be sure to log on to for an in depth and factual exposure of these Floral Order Gatherer Middlemen with their deceptive and fraudulent tactics.

    Not because it is spam, but rather because it’s just GOOD EDUCATION which benefits the floral buying public.

  15. With all due respect, it was your blog over your problem with your floral order and the subsequent NON DELIVERY of your ROSES to your loved one and only because YOU (unknowingly) used a MIDDLEMEN COMPANY rather than a REAL FLORIST to insure a proper delivery.

    My only interest is in EDUCATING DA PUBLIC as only a REAL FLORIST CAN DO given the massive misinformation which has been disseminated to DA PUBLIC via the media as of late.

    Otherwise, I would be posting my own FLORIST website which you could then, consider to be personal SPAM.

    Facts are that, wee REAL FLORISTS feel bad when we have to read consumer complaints such as your own order debacle.

    Accordingly, many of us have simply decided to FIGHT BACK in our efforts to ensure that YOU NEVER BECOME A VICTIM of A FLORAL MIDDLEMAN SCAM again.

    Lastly, thanks for being such a nice BLOG HOST and I sincerely hope that, my facts will guide you and your readers for the future when they need REAL FLOWERS from a REAL FLORIST.

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