Time is of The Essence

I know this is going to come as a shock to a lot of you since you’ve conversed with Amoeba and know him to be an intelligent man, but he cannot tell time. Now, he’ll argue that point and even give you the current time on the clock as proof, but the real proof is in his actions, “I’ll be finished here in 15 minutes,” really means, “Go sit down, it’s going to be at least a half an hour, if not longer.”

To that end I have a wish to buy him one of these Seiko Automatic Watches with an alarm. Now, the thing is, I am going to buy the watch for him, but I am going to keep it. When he gives me a time limit like “fifteen minutes” or “half-an-hour”, I will set the watch for the appointed time and then give it to him. When the alarm rings, his time will be up and he can’t say he wasn’t paying attention and didn’t know.

Now, I don’t really expect that Amoeba will start working any faster, but I am thinking he might become a better judge of time. Then, when he tells me how much time I have, I won’t have to guess what he really means.   If Seiko can’t set him right, nobody can!

Time For Valentine’s Day

I can think of at least three people who start their telephone conversations with me with the words, “So, what time is it there?”  I thought that might end when we left Hawaii, but all it has done is switch who is doing the asking.

With that thought in mind, I am contemplating buying Movado Watches for some of the people I love, like Tilden; my sister, Caryl; my dear friend Thom (he hasn’t asked yet, but he will); and my niece, Brooke.  I am thinking I should give them watches set on Friday Harbor time. That way they will always and forever know what time it is where I am.

I also need to buy a watch for myself.  You’d think, having just left Hawaii, I would know what time it is there, but I am so used to adding time to switch time zones,that I have a heck of a time subtracting hours.  If I want to be calling Thom or OJM, I just might need to keep a watch set on Hawaii time.

Plus I never did get my Amoeba that water proof watch I talked about, but now that he is back here doing the work that he loves, he’s going to constantly have his hands in the water.   I don’t think his current watch is up to that task.

Besides, I think it would be perfect to get the people I love watches.  That way they would know that they were in my heart all the time!

A Christmas Tag

Attention Thom:

I want to be tagged!  Tag Heuer has been making precision Swedish watches for 150 years. I have been having trouble keeping track of time lately and I am thinking perhaps you should get me one of these.  When you call, I always seem to be a day late and running around in circles.  What do you think?  Will a new watch make me better organized?

To Everyone Else:

Thom was giving me a ration [again] this morning.  I think he has a spy camera in my house because he calls every morning about 3 minutes after I wake.  He immediately starts rattling off questions or directions and cracks up laughing and/or heckles me when I don’t understand or can’t answer coherently. Then he demands to know what time it is.  I never know.

So, I’m thinking  a Tag Heuer watch would be just perfect — and Thom can pay for it.  That way when he calls me up just to ask what time it is, I can look at my wrist and say, “According to the watch you bought me, it’s too flippin’ early for this call!”  Right?  Right!

Tag, Thom.  You’re IT!