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One Year Later

OC and I just passed our one year anniversary as a cohabitating couple. A few things have changed between then and now. THEN.

Now:

I woke. OC was still asleep. I left the room quietly so I wouldn’t disturb him.

In the living room I read my email, checked my feed reader, and commented on a few blogs. OC slept. I went into the kitchen and emptied the dishwasher. He slept. I got the waffle iron out, mixed up some batter — from scratch! — and set the table. OC slept. I mixed some orange juice. He slept.

I returned to the couch, leaned forward to retrieve my laptop from the coffee table, and looked up to see an intruder come through the lanai door. OC slept.

I stared at the intruder in terror and thought briefly about screaming, but that’s too much drama even for me. Instead I lept from the couch, dashed to the kitchen, grabbed the bug spray, and blasted the intruder with at least a half a cup! The intruder writhed on the floor in agony. OC still slept!

I grabbed a piece of old newspaper and bundled the intruder up in it, squeezing until I was certain it was well and truly dead. OC slept.

Having vanquished the intruder, I headed to the bathroom for a well deserved shower. OC slept. However, when I emerged from the bathroom, he was awake and ready to start the day. He was overjoyed to see the waffle iron out. I plugged it in and took the condiments from the fridge. OC sat on the couch and opened his lap top.

I said, “We had an intruder this morning.”

OC looked up with great concern. “Who? Wha–”

“A centipede,” I said.

OC looked around. “Where?”

I pointed at the can of bug spray. “I murdered it.”

“Oh,” OC said. His attention returned to his laptop.

“It tried to murder me,” I said. “And you slept right through it!”

OC grunted.

“Hey,” I said. “It could have killed me. You’d have come out here and found my dead body on the floor and the centipede doing high kicks on my nose.”

OC looked up from his computer, raised his eye brows and said, “Right.”

“You are the hero,” I said. “It’s your job to save me. You’re not supposed to be asleep when I am in mortal peril.”

“Uh-huh,” he answered, eyes still on his computer.

“Don’t you have anything to say for yourself?” I queried.

“When’s breakfast?” He asked hopefully.

* * *

Happy Anniversary, OC. I love you. Aren’t you glad to have me?

Quilly is the pseudonym of Charlene L. Amsden, who lives on The Big Island in Hawaii. When she is not hanging out with Amoeba, she is likely teaching or sewing. Or she could be cooking, taking photographs, or even writing. But if she's not doing any of that, she's probably on Facebook or tinkering with her blog.

25 Comments

  1. Amber — thank you.

    Indrani — thank you.

    Brian — and I think you’ve been with us most every post of the way ….

    Shelly — thank you.

    Juliana — well, I know they are poisonous if they bite you, but I don’t know if they are poisonous if we bite them, and I’m thinking I’d rather not find out.

    Dr. John — not usually. That’s why I was giving him such a hard time.

    Marites — welcome and thank you.

    Holly — I am very allergic to centipede venom, so I really wasn’t sure I should try to kill it. Staying far away seemed most sensible, then I remembered the insecticide.

  2. They are probably poisonous if you bite them…please don’t go there.

    Folding bullitens isn’t the best way to spend your anniversary, but I’m betting you had fun with it. If I could get it there, I’d send you some black bean soup. Do they sell the beans over there? It is very super easy to make, as long as you don’t have to make vegan broth, and we have it often. If you are vegan, then you know how to make it. The penne with roasted red peppers is so good, too.

    You are probably already getting ready for church now. Oh, I thought it was you who had a clock on your blog so we would know what time it is. It is 9:30pm here and I think there is a 5 hour time difference so it is either 4:30pm there or 2:30am. I’m thinking it is the 4:30 pm one because when we were in Honolulu it was really great to wake up in the middle of the night, but the bummer part was when we came home and the jet lag was awful….and we got home like December 23rd. I was so very mellow on Christmas Eve when I went to the grocery store. I was still mentally so laid back. :o)

  3. The was a quick year! Happy Anniversary, I am so glad and happy things are so great for you two. I have enjoyed reading about your adventures that is for sure. You are so dramatic, as I would be also about OC not saving you, you crack me up!!

  4. Amber — I am not vegetarian or vegan. I love me some good steak! Kill the chicken. Kill the bunny. Eat it. Eat it. Eat it. However, I also very much like black beans, so would you share the soup recipe?

    Andrew — thank you.

    Stella — sometimes I think my conservative scientist isn’t quite certain what to think of me, but he loves me. I am one very lucky lady.

  5. Karen — let’s talk too late. Our actual anniversary was July 1st, and we were both so busy that — although we mentioned it — nothing was done to celebrate until this weekend.

  6. In the sky? No. We were told we’d be able to see them from our living room window, but it didn’t happen. We didn’t mind.

    In my heart? Always.

  7. Happy anniversary!! (Sorry it is late.) At least he is obviously comfortable with you!! ;0)

    And you with him of course. A great match.

  8. hmmmmmmm I guess I have no idea how big an Hawaiian centipede is, or how deadly……haha

    anyway, OC sounds he likes his waffles…haha

  9. Nea — they are about as big around and long as a pencil, and their bite is poisonous (I am extremely allergic). There is a photo of one behind the THEN link in the first paragraph of the post.

  10. Well I guess with that many legs to kick you, they would be rather ferocious!

    Happy anniversary!
    Elijah’s Daddy and I celebrate 5 years of marriage and 10 years of togetherness this month. There must be something about July…

  11. Mumma — that, and their bite is poisonous. They pack the same venom as bees, and I am extremely allergic to bees.

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