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All Keyed Up

He answered the phone.

She said, “This is an obscene phone call.”

He sighed, exasperated. “Not again?”

She said, “Yep.  Put your hands in your pockets.”

After a brief pause he said, “Nope.  Haven’t got ’em.”

She said, “Then where are they?”

He suggested the table in the spare room.  Then he suggested his desk.  The bathroom counter?

She said, “I looked through your music carrier.  They aren’t here, either.  What is the first thing you did when you got out of the car?”

He said, “They aren’t in my backpack here. Check the table outside.”

She went out to the carport. “Not in the car.”

He said, “Oh good.  The table?”

She said, “Nope. Not on the — here they are, on the blue recycle bin.”

He said, “Well, at least you found them.”

She said, “And what is it you’re going to say the next time I leave the keys in the door knob?”

He said, “I don’t know.  What is it I am going to say?”

She said, “Not a thing.”


  1. Bill — you are probably lost because you’ve never had to share a set of house keys.

    Love — I can’t watch the video at work, but I have no doubt that we need a designated place to keep those keys. How about the door knob?

  2. Juliana — perhaps, & maybe we just need some “pay attention.”

    Carletta — well, I didn’t while I was looking for the keys, but after I found them I certainly thought it was worth poking fun at him.

    Dr. John — ah, but I also deserve to say nothing because I lose the house keys so often. OC and I make a nice pair.

  3. Love it.
    Reminded me of a July conversation involving…keys. I was supposed to have them, he insisted having handed them out to me five minutes ago, I thought of my own insanity not remembering a thing. But we found them. Next to his things on his side of the car…

  4. I’m with Mumma! Keys are cheap… sounds like you guys need several sets! One for the ignition, one for the door, one for the recycle bin, one for the counter, one for his gym bag, one for your purse…. I think 10 sets oughta do it!

  5. I carry three sets in my purse!!!
    Three sets, with huge key rings.
    And I’m still scared that one day I might lock myself out!
    It has happened before!!

  6. I live in the boonies so there are plenty of places here to put a hide-a-key….you probably don’t have that option…hmmmm.
    Friday Harbor next summer?

  7. Andrew — I trust you would feel the dsame if you were wandering through your house following clues given you over the phone so you could find the car keys and go to work?

    Mumma — we have THREE. One bent key I keep in my purse for emergency use only. A good key that is always in OC’s key wallet in his pocket. And a good key on the fancy ($80.00) electronic fob which we share.

    Mar — we have the key conversation too often. My house keys get left in the door knob, our car keys get left in OC’s pocket.

    Melli — the keys to my car are $27.00 a piece, unless I want the electronic fob, too, in which case they are $107.00

    Jientje — that is why I alwaus carry the bent key!
    I don’t like to put it in the ignition, but it can be used to unlock the door on occasion.

    Shelly — I don’t know, the top of the blue recycle dumpster worked pretty well for hiding the key. Sure it was in plain sight, but really, who would ever look there?

  8. I swear keys hide. At least mine hide frequently. One would think that at my advanced age I would have thought of putting them somewhere central and in the same spot for a long time. We have even lived in this house for over 30 years and I still haven’t got it that I need to have a spot for them. In fact hubby just asked “Where are your keys?”

    How on earth do you share a set of house keys? I don’t even have a key to my house. I go in and out the garage door. I figure if the bad guys get into the garage they would have plenty of time to break in the door without being seen. I refuse to get a jillion keys made to this house because my husband hasn’t truly understood that a locksmith can key all the locks to one key. Until that time I’ll do without and complain a lot.

  9. Why not have key hooks inside the house near the front door. We have a row of hooks for cars and house keys. But they are just a little distance away from the door for ‘smash and grabbers’ ! Every night we then take the whole bunch into our bedroom section of the house which is locked – we live in South Africa – you have to do these crime prevention things !!!!!

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