“Man, dude, I ain’t laughed so hard in weeks. This picture of a loser in a rowboat thumbin’ his nose at the waves. ‘Maybe his psychiatrist was right‘. Ha! Gnarly, as you’d say, dude. Um, dude? Dude?”
“What the hell are you doin’, dude?”
“Will you be careful what you’re breathin’ on, dude? You’re messin’ me up!”
“And you gettin’ messed up is new how?”
“Look, dude, while some dudes are snortin’ over themselves lookin’ at pictures, I’m tryin’ to do somethin’ useful.”
“By cuttin’ up little tiny pieces of sandpaper?!?”
“That’s what they’re callin’ for, dude. They obviously want me to grind somethin’ down. Somethin’ really small. Dammed if I know what, but I figured I’d lay out the tools, and they’d tell me what to do on the day.”
“On the day?”
“Yeah, dude. Happens every Monday, I hear. Must be they got a lot of stuff to grind, so they have to make it a group project.”
“Well, this Stony River chick, to name one.”
“And what’re they callin’ this project of theirs?”
“You idiot! Not ‘microfRiction’. MicroFICTION! Tall tales short enough to fit in your iPhone so’s you can read ’em while drivin’. Nothin’ to do with sandpaper!”
“I dunno ’bout that, dude.”
“You’re a tall tale, and you can get pretty abrasive sometimes …”
17 thoughts on “Dude and Dude: Non Dudi Carborundum”
Funny. Especially the line about reading them while you drive. What does non carborundum mean, anyhow?
Dawg, see Nessa’s comment. I’m surprised that a lexicographer of your erudition and astuteness has not yet come across this.
I’m a word at a time kind of guy. Thanks for the phrase.
Those dudes won’t let anyone grind them down.
Great way to participate without actually joining in. A testament to the dudes ongoing rebelliousness.
Nessa, as you’ve observed, the Dudes do their own grinding.
Not for breakfast, I hope, Melli …
Thanks for stopping by my blog. Glad you liked Jonah’s wail.
I liked your different take on the picture, dude.
‘little tiny pieces of sandpaper’ – brilliant! For little tiny tools, obviously.
That just about sums up the Dudes, Jabblog …
somebody must have ground down this page’s speed… it takes forever to load! perhaps some WD40 would help? whaddya think, dudes?
Nah, Polona, I reckon in this case the WD-40 would just make matters worse. If you try to make a circuit too short, you get a short circuit. Might work for fiction, but not for electronics.
Wonder if the stories fit on a Droid as well? 🙂
First tell me that the Droids are pledged to conform to the Laws of Robotics, Thom, then I’ll worry about how they work out the details about stories.
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