I overheard this conversation while waiting to walk across the street at a Waikiki stoplight. A young lady, on her cell phone, says:
“So this Joey guy shows up at my door and he’s gorgeous and I’m thinking this blind date thing might not be so bad after-all. Then he takes me to The Steak House and I’m thinking like, oh wow, this guy isn’t cheap. Then we sit down and he starts to read the menu out loud. I’m flipping through mine and he says, “Are you listening to me?” I’m like, I’m trying to read the menu, and he says, “I’m reading you your choices.” Right then I’m thinking like WTF, but I find the page he’s on and follow along while he reads the F’n menu out loud.”
Pause while she listens.
Cell phone girl: “Yeah, like for real, like he thinks I can’t read or something! But it gets worse. I ordered steak and calamari, right? So, when the order arrives and the waiter puts it down in front of me, this Joey says, “Now this is your steak, and this is your calamari.” He pointed at each of them and I know I am staring at him with my mouth open and again I am thinking WTF, and he says, “This is your vegetable and here’s your napkin.” So he hands me the napkin and I say, like, excuse me, cuz I’m thinking he thinks I’m a real idiot. He says, “Pardon?” And I say, so what did you just tell me? And he repeats, “This is your steak, this is your –“ I interrupted him. I said, you’re kidding, right? And he’s all, “No, this is your steak and this is your calamari.” Then he picks up the knife and starts cutting my f’n steak! I couldn’t f’n believe it!”
Pause while she listens.
“Well, it’s like you know… So, yeah, I am going to see him again. But you won’t believe what he did next …”
The light changed, the crowd surged forward and I will likely never know what he did next or why she’s going out with him again. And, since I didn’t want to be the only one dying of curiosity, I thought I’d share the story with you.