Blind Date

I overheard this conversation while waiting to walk across the street at a Waikiki stoplight.  A young lady, on her cell phone, says:

“So this Joey guy shows up at my door and he’s gorgeous and I’m thinking this blind date thing might not be so bad after-all.  Then he takes me to The Steak House and I’m thinking like, oh wow, this guy isn’t cheap.  Then we sit down and he starts to read the menu out loud.  I’m flipping through mine and he says, “Are you listening to me?”  I’m like, I’m trying to read the menu, and he says, “I’m reading you your choices.”  Right then I’m thinking like WTF, but I find the page he’s on and follow along while he reads the F’n menu out loud.”

Pause while she listens.

Cell phone girl: “Yeah, like for real, like he thinks I can’t read or something! But it gets worse.  I ordered steak and calamari, right?  So, when the order arrives and the waiter puts it down in front of me, this Joey says, “Now this is your steak, and this is your calamari.”  He pointed at each of them and I know I am staring at him with my mouth open and again I am thinking WTF, and he says, “This is your vegetable and here’s your napkin.”  So he hands me the napkin and I say, like, excuse me, cuz I’m thinking he thinks I’m a real idiot.  He says, “Pardon?”  And I say, so what did you just tell me?  And he repeats, “This is your steak, this is your –”  I interrupted him.  I said, you’re kidding, right?  And he’s all, “No, this is your steak and this is your calamari.”  Then he picks up the knife and starts cutting my f’n steak! I couldn’t f’n believe it!”

Pause while she listens.

“Well, it’s like you know… So, yeah, I am going to see him again.  But you won’t believe what he did next …”

The light changed, the crowd surged forward and I will likely never know what he did next or why she’s going out with him again.  And, since I didn’t want to be the only one dying of curiosity, I thought I’d share the story with you.

38 thoughts on “Blind Date

  1. Cooper, you just made me fall off my chair laughing. I take it you’ve dated your fair share of psychopaths? So tell me — your expert opinion — why would she go out with him again?

      • I like Silverneurotic’s assessment — he just misunderstood the term “blind date”, but Sauerkraut thinks it might have been the sex. I can’t for the life of me comprehend being hard up enough to have sex with him. This is my penis. This is your vagina.

  2. I wonder if he walked her through the awkward separation at the door.

    “This is your palm and this is my cheek.”

  3. Holy Tamoley! I’m surprised he let her make any selection off the menu. And of course she’s seeing him again. I’m not sure which one I’m more disappointed in. Oy! Not that I have an opinion or anything. LOL

  4. I did find the conversation interesting. At first I thought he was doing what he thought a gentleman should do. Then i thought he thought she was from another country and didn’t know English, but when he cut her meat i could not find a reason. Maybe she is going out again because she is trying to figure him out.

    bettygram’s last blog post..Raven challenge 63

    • Betty — that’s pretty much the same line of reasoning I followed listening to the conversation. I was sure it was just a simple misunderstanding.

  5. So this was a blind date, right? Maybe he thought or was told that she was developmentally challenged. I sort of think she was, because she didn’t get to the bottom of why he was acting the way he did. She didn’t have one thing to lose by calling him on his behavior. *shudder*

    I’m with the ameoba on this..they are both not really too interesting, but I do wonder why she would consider going out with him again.

    amberstar’s last blog post..Tornadoes and stuff

  6. Good idea ! now we are here without knowing a happy or unhappy end ! I won’t sleep this night !

    Gattina’s last blog post..

    • Melli, if I get to judge, she was very attractive to look at, but did you catch her side of the conversation? She was a bit too well, like, you know for me.

  7. At least you were amused. Seems like the cel phone blabbers I always end up next to are boring, they don’t seem to be having conversations….ohhh…did I just admit to eavesdropping? hehe.

    Shelly’s last blog post..From Creepy to Tiki

  8. Shelly — some cell phone gabbers one can’t help but listen to because they speak so loudly one wonders why they’re actually using the phone. Other than that, eavesdropping has provided me with many hours of entertainment.

  9. oh well, i gues sone eventually gets what one deserves, so… i’m with the ‘boring’ part. the conversation did sound intriguing but i seriously doubt i would want to stick around such folks

    juliana’s last blog post..Dancing in the city

    • Oh man, what a scary thought! That does seem the logical next step though doesn’t it? I’m glad it wasn’t me. He’s have spent the rest of the night in the emergency room trying to have the fork dislodged from his forehead!

  10. Perhaps his mother put a label on each food item and fork fed him when he was younger… when the Tweener was about 2, she expected me to tell her what everything on her plate, to cut the meat into little pieces and to fork feed everything to her. Thankfully, she outgrew that phase. Perhaps that guy never has.

    But why would the girl go out on a second date with him? Is she that enamored with eye candy? Or was he really terrific later on. …

    sauerkraut’s last blog post..Post No. 500 coming right up… then… should I cool it or should I blow?

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