Dude and Dude Do “The Potluck”

“Dude! Ya gotta see this!”

“Wassup?”

Food fight!

“Where? Who?”

“Right here! OC and Quilly! Picnic and snack stuff! They’re givin’ each other the … um … they’re talkin’ ’bout fingers!

“Nice save, dude.”

“Wonder which one’s tellin’ the truth?”

“Neither.”

“Neither?”

“Look. The dude’s restin’ up for next basketball season. Probably on his own private island or somethin’. Y’think he’s gonna take five seconds of his time to let anyone try to tell him ’bout this horsemeat?”

“Nah, probably not. But … horsemeat?

“Dude, that potluck thing was hours ago. It’s dead by now. Instead of floggin’ it, we should probably cook it.”

Ewwww, dude! Not kosher!

Potluck ~ The Non-Fiction Version

Okay, if you’ve read what He Said They Said,
here is what She Says They Really Said:

She: “You may have the car today, I’m not going anywhere. I finished my grocery shopping yester– … Crap!”

He: “What did you forget?”

She: “And after I’d already gone back to the market once yesterday and told Nina that I had a bone to pick with her, ’cause she’d let me check out without reminding me to pick up, um …”

He: “What did you forget?”

She: “She didn’t know either.”

He: “That was yesterday. What did you forget today?”

She: “Sunday’s potluck. They want finger food.”

He: “Finger food!” He crossed his arms and hid his hands. “I’m not going to church on Sunday!”

She:  “What do you mean, you’re not going?  You just spent a good chunk of yesterday afternoon with Don and Terry practicing special music.  What do you plan to tell them?”

He: “I don’t think I’ll have to tell Terry anything.  Don can still sing if we’re having finger food, but Terry won’t be able to play the organ and I won’t be able to play my trumpet!”

She: “Honey, the congregation likes your trumpet enough that I don’t think you’ll have to worry about your fingers.”

He: “Oh, OK then, you’d better take the car and get to the store. Stalking the neighborhood with a cleaver isn’t the best thing for our reputation.”

She:  “You realize I am going to share this conversation at church don’t you?”

He:  “Good, maybe it will spoil their appetites and they’ll leave my fingers alone!”

The Potluck

She: “You may have the car today, I’m not going anywhere. I finished my grocery shopping yesterday … oh, no, I didn’t!

He: “What did you forget?”

She: “And after I’d already gone back to the market once yesterday and told the clerk that I had a bone to pick with her, ’cause she’d let me check out without reminding me to pick up, um …”

He:What did you forget?

She: “She didn’t know either.”

He: “That was yesterday. What did you forget today?

She: “Sunday’s potluck. They want finger food.”

He: “Oh, OK then, you’d better take the car and get to the store. Stalking the neighborhood with a cleaver isn’t the best thing for our reputation.”

She: “I’m going to tell the people at the church that you said that!”